~If a man digs a pit, he will fall into it; if a man rolls a stone, it will roll back on him.~
If we value and respect someone, we can say what is required without that person feeling rejected. Consider Jesus’ encounter with the Samaritan woman in John 4. When Jesus said, “You have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband” [4:18], she did not blow up in his face, or say, “That’s none of your business.” She said, “I can see that you are a prophet” [4:19]. That’s amazing! Because Jesus cared deeply for her, he faced her with her moral failure. Because she sensed that he valued her as a person, she did not feel rejected.
True love is not blind to a friend’s failures. It is willing to confront the failures, but it always distinguishes between who a person is—an individual with intrinsic value—and what a person does.
Consider your friendships. Are you ignoring something that should be confronted because you are a ‘friend’? Or have you withdrawn love and respect because you don’t like some particular behavior? Ask God how to correct this.